The Beholders: Part IV

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

Author/Artist: author_by_night

Title: The Beholders
Part IV: Andromeda

Rating & Warnings:  PG-13

Word Count/Art Medium: 1,397

Prompt(s): 4. Style: Multple narrators, not to be Remus or Tonks.

Summary: For better or worse, Remus and Tonks didn't always know how to see themselves. At their worst, they were too similar for comfort, yet too
different to grasp. At their best, they were deeply in love, and that was all that mattered.

Who they were, then, was in the eye of their beholders.

Andromeda Tonks, July 1996

They moved Headquarters to the Tonks home a few weeks after Sirius's death, concerned that with Sirius gone, the house would naturally go to Bellatrix. The only way to be sure was to have Harry test it, and Dumbledore insisted on waiting.

Andromeda was not an official member of the Order; during the first war, she and Ted hadn't known about it until Sirius joined, although unbeknownst to them, a few of their friends were in it. And this time around, Andromeda hadn't approved of Dumbledore dictating what Sirius did. She felt that he was taking it upon himself to decide for people, and it struck her as dangerous. Besides, neither Andromeda nor Ted were the fighting sort. That was their daughter, and they barely batted an eye when she joined.

Still, Andromeda felt she should do something. So when Dora told her the Order needed a new home, she gave them one. It was her way of being in the Order without having to be in the Order. Sometimes she even prepared tea for them. Andromeda insisted she wasn't being kind or generous - it was just the proper thing to do. The good feeling it gave her had nothing to do with it.

Or so she tried telling Ted. He laughed and said, "that's my stoic serpent." She told him to stop badgering her. In-jokes were their "thing," if they were the sort of couple inclined to have a "thing."

Andromeda could tell that the Order was suffering emotionally; they'd lost Emmaline just a month after the loss of Sirius. And Remus and Tonks hadn't recovered much at all; Andromeda knew that, because they were obviously trying very hard to act otherwise. Tonks was clumsier than ever, and Remus was strangely clipped about his feelings, even by Remus's standards. Andromeda knew they were both hanging by a thread, and it was just a matter of time before it came crashing down on them.

Perhaps that was also why she insisted the Order have a stable place to meet. Stability helped keep people together. Andromeda wasn't sure she understood why her daughter had to fall in love with a werewolf - it just seemed like a sure way to complicate her life, and being related to Sirius and Bellatrix had complicated it enough. But she liked Remus better as a person than the last bloke Tonks had dated. More importantly, she saw how happy he made Dora.

And yet it was clear their relationship, too, was hanging by a thread.

Andromeda had a feeling she knew what; for starters, their relationship had been founded on Sirius. He was their anchor, their cause, their means. No wonder they were lost. But it wasn't just that. Death tended to remind you of your own dark side. Andromeda had gone through the same thing she suspected Remus was going through. The problem of association, of knowing who you were a lot like. Even the day Bellatrix killed Sirius, Andromeda could hardly look in the mirror because she knew who was staring back, taunting her.

Remus took it a few more levels, however.

Andromeda and Ted were in the room when Dumbledore announced it. They'd just been passing through - maybe, though, the timing was intentional. Dumbledore probably suspected Remus hadn't told Dora. But she needed to know, and she needed her parents there for the news.

What a wise but stupid man.

"And lastly," Dumbledore began after reviewing something Andromeda had missed, "Remus has an announcement."

Remus looked at Dora, then at Dumbledore. "Er - can I -"

"Just tell us, Remus," Dora said wearily.

"I did want to tell you before. We'll talk more about it later, I promise."

Dora raised her eyebrows.

Remus stood up. "After this meeting, I will be going away for a while."

"What?" Dora stood up as well.

Severus was smirking. "Some noble journey to discover yourself, I suppose? Being a lone wolf now?"

"Actually, in a sense, I am," Remus replied.

"Remus, if this is about Sirius and Emmaline, we're hurting too!" Hestia cried.

Fleur nodded. "We 'ave a saying in French-"

Arthur interrupted her. "You shouldn't run away from your problems like this. I've been where you are, but it won't do you any favors if you wander away."

"It isn't about Sirius and Emmaline," Remus said with a sad smile. "Though I do appreciate you trying to keep me from isolating myself out of deep, emotional grief. No, I'm going on a mission. You all may have heard of Fenrir Greyback."

Everyone shuddered.

"I'm going to be spying on his pack."

Andromeda had not anticipated this development.

Dora  rounded on Remus like a very angry vulture. "You're doing what?"

"Dora-"

"You can't do that! He bit you! He'll kill you!"

"I know what I'm doing. I can convince them how much I've suffered at the hands of humans..."

"You are human."

"Not to Umbridge. Or Greyback, for that matter. He's  convinced werewolves are super humans, as opposed to subhuman. There's rumours he's even attacking outside of Full Moons now."

Dora laughed. "And you're going to what, do the tango with him?"

"I'm going to spy and collect information."

"And... transform with them?"

"Yes. Dora, this is no different from the time you metamorphosed as Bellatrix and snuck into the Malfoy Manor."

Andromeda couldn't stop herself. "Excuse me?"

"Not now," Ted whispered.

"It was one time, and I told you before the fact. I even let you come along!"

"And if I'd told you not to, would that have stopped you?"

"This is different, Remus, and you know it - or you would have told me. When were you going to?"

"When it was a good time."

"Which would be..."

"The night before I left," Remus admitted.

"Wrong answer, mate," Bill Weasley muttered.

"Dumbledore helped me plan this, and he knows what he's doing," Remus added.

"You said the same thing about Sirius!" Dora shouted. "Look how well that worked for him!"

Dora stormed off; Remus, for some reason, did not go after her, which infuriated Andromeda. How could he just stand there with his mouth half-open? Hestia made to follow, but seemed to think better of it.

No one was looking at Dumbledore or Remus, so Andromeda took it upon herself to address both of them.

"Stop playing the martyr," She said thinly.

"Mrs. Tonks-" Dumbledore began.

"-you ought to leave. You and your little organization are only here on my invitation, which I have revoked for today."

"Very well," Remus said with a sigh. "I'm... very sorry."

Andromeda clucked her tongue in response.

When everyone  had left, Andromeda went into Dora's old bedroom. It was the first time she'd noticed Dora had kept her old stuffed animals there. Dora was holding one of them, a stuffed unicorn she'd won for at a muggle carnival,  but she wasn't crying. Hestia

"Do you want to talk about it?" Andromeda asked, sitting on her bed.

"He's been so distant lately," Dora said sadly. "I should have known he was doing something stupid."

"Speaking of which, how could you not tell me you pretended to be-"

"Please Mum, not now."

Andromeda closed her eyes. "Fine. I'll lecture you another time."

"I think he's going to end things between us."

"What makes you think that?"

"I read in Witch Weekly once that if a man takes you for a walk in the park, he thinks you should just be friends. Tea at a diner, he's shagging a coworker, or your sister. He wants to have a conversation at night... he's fighting demons and think you'd be better off without him."

"Witch Weekly's rubbish, Dora. You're smart enough to know that."

"So's The Quibbler, yet a few months back it was the truest of them all."

Andromeda knew she'd almost done the same thing for Ted. No. To Ted. She'd known it wouldn't do much good; her family had already disonwed her, she'd burned those bridges long ago, and she needed him. He needed her. Andromeda couldn't hurt someone she loved so much like that.

But the thing that had always given comfort to Andromeda, when she'd questioned his relationship with her daughter, was how kind and brave Remus seemed.

The trouble with brave people was that they sometimes failed to understand that some things weren't meant to be sacrificed.