This is a wonderful start to a story. As I assume that there will be parts for Remus, Andromeda, and Lyall? I'm so interested to see their takes on the prank.
What I loved most about this part is that Sirius opened up to his cousin. A lot of people tend to forget their familial connection. As well as the Order being the first time they have meet as adults on almost equal ground. So this would be the time, for them to grow closer and share less than savory parts of their characters.
I also enjoyed that Tonks does not excuse Sirius, but that she does listen to him. And like any Auror worth her salt, is going to investigate, until she has all sides to the story.
So all in all, this was wonderful with both engaging dialogue and suspense leading into the next part. Great Job!
I did notice some typos though. I hope it is okay that I am pointing them out.
"Of course she knew. Dumbledore contacted me instead of my Mum and Dad. Thought it was better for everyone's safety."
(Did you meant Dumbledore contacted her instead of my Mum and Dad?"
"Maybe I can convince Sirius to com back to the family." (Come back to the family?)
But besides those, everything else was great. Until next time!
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momijizukamori and
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Date: 2018-01-11 05:07 pm (UTC)What I loved most about this part is that Sirius opened up to his cousin. A lot of people tend to forget their familial connection. As well as the Order being the first time they have meet as adults on almost equal ground. So this would be the time, for them to grow closer and share less than savory parts of their characters.
I also enjoyed that Tonks does not excuse Sirius, but that she does listen to him. And like any Auror worth her salt, is going to investigate, until she has all sides to the story.
So all in all, this was wonderful with both engaging dialogue and suspense leading into the next part. Great Job!
I did notice some typos though. I hope it is okay that I am pointing them out.
"Of course she knew. Dumbledore contacted me instead of my Mum and Dad. Thought it was better for everyone's safety."
(Did you meant Dumbledore contacted her instead of my Mum and Dad?"
"Maybe I can convince Sirius to com back to the family." (Come back to the family?)
But besides those, everything else was great. Until next time!